"Strong reasons make strong actions" - William Shakespeare
We give our children courage and bravery by providing them with an authentic rationale for why they should believe what we say. We live in a world where people declare their own greatness and they get paid unbelievable amounts of money without really having to prove why they're great or worthy of being paid that amount of money (pro athletes, musicians, actors, etc.) Our children are bombarded with shallow messages in advertising, television, movies, etc. and we need to be their authentic voice of reason telling them WHY they are great and worthy and treasured and believed in. Children are more likely to believe us when we give them reasons and justification for our comments to them.
Write your child a note. On the top of the paper write: "I believe in you because" and list several reasons. Repeat with "You can count on me because" and "I treasure you because". Share this with your child at some point - and allow her to keep the note. Every couple of days reaffirm what you said - "Do you know why I believe in you so much?" And then every couple of months reaffirm your comments.
(while I believe what the gist of the chapter is all about, I have to say this has been a weak chapter in terms of explaining, but did provide many examples. It was difficult to summarize without quoting.)
Tuesday, March 10, 2009