Somehow my children have survived this long.

I just got home from the grocery store and had yet another experience where I was made to feel like a completely unfit mother who has absolutely no business having children of my own. I'm a little sick of having these experiences, but don't know how to go about reacting to them or alleviating them - unless I just never take my kids to the store with me.

Here is what happened:

I dropped Nora off at preschool and continued on to the grocery store with Ryann and Georgia. I don't normally do my major grocery shopping with more than one child at a time, however, I just needed a couple of things (milk, buy one get one free pot roast, baking stuff - you know, just a couple of things that turn into a basket-ful). We grabbed a cart and as per our usual routine, Ryann goes in the basket and Georgia sits in the seat.

We're cruising along, getting our couple of things and eventually Georgia turns around in the seat. Fine. Ryann has been standing the whole time in the basket and flies from one side to the other as we turn corners. Ahhhh, now Georgia is also standing in the seat and holding onto the bar.

And just so you know - this is typical and I am very, very careful with both of them doing this. I have found that it is less stressful for me to allow them to stand and do these things while I carefully push the cart and keep a hand on Georgia the whole time than to insist over and over and over again that they sit down. The whole sitting down thing for either one of them will certainly involve lots of crying and tantrums and lots of firm words and warnings from me, so I prefer to be careful and let them stand if they want. I have been doing this since Ryann was Georgia's age and she insisted on surfing in the seat - I have years of experience in this regard;)

And now that you all think that I'm completely unfit, I'll continue with the story...

We've made it through the entire grocery store now and are looking at the small gift basket displays so I can pick something out for my dogsitter who will be sitting twice over the holidays. We are right next to a huge display of champagne bottles and Ryann almost reaches over and grabs one, but since I am the alert and aware mother that I am, I quickly redirect her hands and her attention to something else and get her the heck away from the champagne bottle display.

I'm looking at the gift baskets... one hand on Georgia who is sitting in the seat and an ear on Ryann who is doing exactly what she has been doing the whole time we were there (playing with the food that is in the cart). A woman comes running from two aisles away and grabs Ryann and starts spewing things about how she was about to fall (she wasn't) and how "the floor will really hurt your head - I guarantee it." I thank her and she leaves. I had some other choice things to say to her, however, I held my tongue. I'm guessing she had some other things she wanted to share with me, but my demeanor told her she'd best be moving on her way.

I have this all the time. This time was a bit worse and more extreme than others (as in the lady's attitude was a bit worse this time), but it happens a lot. Do I really look like a completely ditsy, unable to care for my children type of woman? Do I look too young? too irresponsible? too neglectful? too unaware of my surroundings? What is it? Or is it simply the neurosis of these older women?

And as an aside - while I'm not meaning to offend anyone who happens to be in this age group, it does tend to be women in their 50's who do this to me. Women in their 40's generally look at the girls, smile and very sweetly (and patronizingly) say something along the lines of "Honey, you'd better sit down, you don't want to fall and get hurt." Women in their 60's tend to look at the girls, look at me, smile, tell me how cute they are and continue on their way. But the women in their 50's seem to have trouble keeping their opinions about my mothering skills to themselves - and they don't come right out and say things, it is more of the passive aggressive comments that they say to the girls that are specifically designed to let me know that they think I'm doing something wrong.

So tell me - how am I supposed to react? Have you had any situations like this? Am I being hyper-sensitive? (I normally don't really care, but this woman kind of ticked me off because her attitude was so judgemental and condescending) Any thoughts on the age difference and difference in attitudes? Am I the only one?