Mission: Frugal/Save Money

Give me your best frugal tips - the ones that you're kind of embarassed to tell other people about because they will look at you like you're a cheapo (and the ones you're not embarassed to share).

I'll start:

1. I cut dryer sheets (fabric softener) in half. A 200 sheet box of Bounce dryer sheets that I bought on clearance at Target has lasted me over 1-2 years (can't remember when I bought them.

2. I put a bucket under the hose that comes out of the washing machine to catch the rinse water and I pour it into my next load for the wash cycle (water in Homer Glen is guaranteed twice as expensive as yours... $100/month vs. most people paying less than $100/quarter).

Buzzing

I've got a million things buzzing in my head right now and I'm not sure I can articulate any of them in a succinct manner... Hmmmm - I can't even organize them in my head.

Lets see if I can at least get the related topic out of my head and maybe expand at a later date...

* Per our 17 year old friend - America does not respect their elderly the way other countries do. This is a sad situation - they have wisdom that we do not, we should show them more respect.

* Feeling like it is an uphill, against the tornado like wind battle to create community when it seems like no one around me (physically) wants it. Also feeling distracted and held back by schedules and my own introvertedness. As discussed last night with Dave and 17 year old - we may not be able to change the world, but we can try to change our corner. But even THAT sounds overwhelming.

* I want to strip down to the basics in the month of December. Get rid of the distractions and be intentional about the holiday season. This will mean getting rid of the tv again.

* My children are out of control because I've been not-quite-100% for two weeks and have taken the path of least resistence... most often resulting in them watching tv and me playing computer games. I'm on drugs now and beginning to feel better and it is now time for Dykstra Boot Camp.

* We have more money than we thought in our home equity line which results in it lasting for possibly 6-9 months instead of 4-5 months. This is HUGE and probably warrants a detailed explanation at another time.

* I want to bake for the neighbors like Jen talks about here. But going door to door to our neighbors sounds very scary. Per Dave (who has knocked on every one of their doors for work) 9 out of 10 will not want to have anything to do with me, but I'm looking for that 1 that is craving community and love like I am. I'm not a statistics or math person, but that sounds like a lot of work;)

* This post by Dave's cousin, Amy, really has me thinking. Thinking about how to be intentional with my kids and how battle weary I feel with them most of the time .

* Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and felt prompted to pray for someone? I had that twice last night for the same friend.


I need to get in the shower... I'm off to visit my friend's 90 year old mother who just moved into a nursing home around here from Florida. She has stories and she has wisdom and I am excited to have a chance to talk with her and learn from her.

Sometimes our choices result in suckiness

I chose to stay home with my kids. I quit my job as soon as I got pregnant with Nora. Partly because my boss continually took me on an emotional roller coaster for 3 years - that was the reason I quit immediately after finding out. But I also quit early because I knew I'd be staying home and I wanted to start figuring out how to live on one income before bringing a baby into the mix.

I have no opinion on whether or not other moms should stay at home or work when they have kids... I really don't care whether a person chooses to work or stay at home - I'm just going to put it out there. I think the debate is silly and I have no desire or intention to get started with it here - my personal opinion is that I have enough responsibility and stress in making my own decisions, that I really don't want or need to make anyone else's decisions - we do what works for our family, and by all means everyone else should do what works for their families.

We made this decision together. Dave and I agreed that we wanted someone home with our children and because he was in the money making job and I wasn't following a career path, naturally I was the one who was designated as the stay at home parent.

I am happy with our choice - most days. I love being a part of my girls' lives. I love being here for everything. I love being able to hug them and kiss them whenever I want to. I also love it when they go to school and get out of my hair for a while:)

There are sporadic times, though, where I kind of resent being in the position that I'm in. Not often anymore - especially not as often as when I had a baby on a nap schedule or had a newborn and an 18 month old. But there are times.

I have been sick for the last 10 days. Actually, I've been sick since the middle of October - started in Mexico - but one thing got better and a couple of days later another thing hit.

While in Mexico I started hacking up a lung for no apparent reason... no head cold, no congestion, just random productive coughing fits. A few days after returning I went to the urgent care because I thought I might have bronchitis and since I babysit an infant, I wanted to do something about it right away. It wasn't bronchitis, just a cold and I was sent on my way and it disappeared soon after.

A few days later, I started feeling head congestion and had a stuffy nose. Within a couple of days my head felt like it was going to explode. I actually skipped running one day - that is UNHEARD of for me (I ran in Mexico even though I was hacking up a lung at the time). It didn't seem to get better with the medicine that Dave bought for me. I was pretty sure I had a sinus infection and was going to head over to the urgent care again to get some antibiotics.

But then I got ticked. I'm sick of not being able to see MY doctor when I'm sick. I have gone to the urgent care every time I've been sick for the last several years. They don't treat me very nice over there and they charge twice as much. I wanted to see MY doctor this time and not be some random person in the urgent care.

But this turns into lots of drama - which is why I've been going to the urgent care. I babysit 3 days a week (this week was 4). The baby is 5 months old and cries - a lot - so I don't know how he's going to be in public and I'm not willing to find out in the doctor's office. So the days I babysit are out. In addition, I have a busy 3 year old who likes to hide in the cupboards or climb on the bench or open all of the drawers and take everything out (this is what she does at her doctor's office). If I am on constant vigil with her, how in the world am I going to be able to focus on the doctor and MY issues? So I choose not to bring my kids with me when I'm sick... even if I chose to bring them, I still have to work around bus and preschool schedules - so when I called today and found out the only appointment they had available was noon, I had to decline because Ryann starts school at noon and there's no way I'd be able to get her to school and myself (and Georgia & Nick) to the doctor by noon, without paying the school to have her come early.

I also have to work around Dave's schedule. He usually gets home between 6:30 and 7 - doctor's office is closed. And he has multiple appointments/meetings throughout the day... If I could schedule my illnesses 2 weeks in advance he would have no problem finding a time to come home to stay with the girls while I go to the doctor. As I have yet to figure out how to do that, I instead go to the urgent care.

But like I said - I got ticked off about it over the weekend and refused to go to the urgent care anymore. Somehow, something would have to work out differently.

Fortunately for me, I started to feel better the very next day and didn't feel like I needed to see the doctor anymore. And then last night the pressure came back and I'm back in the full-swing of a sinus infection.

My wonderful husband - knowing my feelings about going to the urgent care again - told me to try to get an appointment tonight after 4 or any time tomorrow. He had too many appointments today to be able to help me out today, but he was sure he could move people around tomorrow if necessary. I love him. I'm going tomorrow at 9.

Anyway, back to the resentment thing. This is it - I resent not being able to live my life on my schedule and do things at the times that I want to do them. I know that I choose to make things a bit more difficult by opting out of the children-along-for-the-ride thing, but I don't see how bringing them with me would make things less stressful or easier or more productive. When Dave is sick, he just calls the doctor and fits it in. When I'm sick - or want to get a haircut - I have to consider 4 other people before I can try to work into someone else's schedule. I long for the day when I can just pick up and go when I want to.

I am now done whining.

I had an interesting conversation the other day. We were at a company holiday party (how brilliant is a Thanksgiving party vs. a Christmas party?) and I was talking to two wives of veteran FA's (both have been with Jones for 15 years). They were talking about how crabby their husbands are because of the market and how it is affecting their clients...

Paraphrase/summary of conversation:

Wife 1: We haven't seen anything this bad in the 15 years that we've been doing this.

Wife 2: Well, 9/11 was pretty bad.

Me: Its pretty difficult right now.

1: Is Dave crabby too? It will get better.

Me: His paycheck was $700 last month. After our tithe that left almost nothing. Our mortgage payment is almost $2000.

2: Then I think its time to rethink your tithe. God doesn't want you to lose your house.


I whole-heartedly disagree with that statement - the part about rethinking the tithe. First of all, the tithe wasn't the difference between paying our bills and not paying our bills. Second, our tithe is non-negotiable... it doesn't get rethought - there is never a question about whether or not we will pay it. We do. And thats it.

Before we were married my dad had a conversation with us in the car one night. Dave will never forget this - it really, really stuck with him. My dad told us - when we were discussing some kind of money matter and marriage - that we needed to start tithing right then because if we didn't we never would. It would be much easier to do it at that point while we didn't have as many bills/responsibilities than it would be to try to add it in a year, 2 years, 10 years down the road. My dad was never super involved in church - he had been disillusioned with the politics while on consistory as a young man (that is to say, he attended church regularly, he just didn't get involved beyond that). He told us that night that although he didn't volunteer or involve himself more, he could and always did financially support the church and that tithing was his spiritual gift.

We can argue that or not argue that point (tithing = spiritual gift) - it doesn't matter. The broader lesson for us was: You tithe. Period. And you start as soon as possible. My dad encouraged me and my sister as high schoolers to give part of our paychecks back to God and while I didn't do so consistently, I can say that I occasionally did. I tried to tithe in college, but since my church attendance was so sporadic I think my tithing was as well. But from that conversation forward we have always tithed and as I've said, it has never been negotiable. This wasn't a huge lesson for me because I grew up learning it, but it was a big lesson for Dave and he became as committed to it as I was already.

Our pastor preaches on tithing every year. And every year he uses a verse from Malachi where God says, (big time paraphrase because I don't know the exact verse) "Test me on this. Bring your tithe back to the storehouse and I will open the floodgates of blessing on you." While our pastor is diligent in reiterating that this does not mean that God will bless us financially by bringing our tithe, it does sometimes come across that way. We don't tithe because we want something back for doing it, we do so out of obedience. And believe me, this is probably the only way I am consistently obedient;)

In addition, while we are really struggling with finances right now I could not cut out our tithe - for the same reason my dad advised us to start right away: because if I cut it out, how will I ever be able to add it back in?

Do I think God wants me to lose my house? No, absolutely not. I think God is providing for me in ways that I'm unaware of right now. I believe that he knows the future and I do not. He tells me to bring him a tenth of our earnings and I do so because I want to honor and obey him.

Is this a test of faith? HECK yeah - especially because not only are we tithing, but we've committed to a monthly amount above that for the capital campaign at our church (a number that somehow we individually came up with while praying about it on our own... somehow the numbers matched without ever having a conversation about it). Dave and I have lived our married life with the understanding that sometimes God asks us to take steps in faith - I have many examples where we have had that conversation because the move we were about to make made absolutely no sense whatsoever. Tithing right now probably doesn't make sense to many people, but it is my step in faith right now. God has always provided after our previous steps and I know - even if we do end up losing our house - that he is providing right now and will continue to do so. My measly tenth isn't changing the world right now, but it continually changes me.

Keeping it real

So here we are... I'm private and I'm real from here on out. Beware - and I'm warning myself, too - being real for me may mean sharing actual numbers and actual realities of life in our house and in our family. I continually wonder how people can be authentic with each other without being honest... If I don't share real stuff and real numbers with someone, how will that person know me and know my situation. If I'm vague, it leaves opportunity to assume or come to conclusions. If I'm specific it doesn't. I also recognize that being specific opens me and my family up to criticism and judgement. So thats what I'm most scared of...



However, Dave (no more Cornbread), was telling me the other day that he started feeling better once he realized he had to get off of the island and reach out to other people. No more living on an island with a cell phone that I won't use, hoping for rescue... hoping that someone will just KNOW that I need help getting off of the island. It is by reaching out to others that they will know that I need help - whether it is specific help or prayers or whatever. And please hear me - I'm not in desperate need of help, I'm just saying that living on an island and trying to do things all on my own and not reaching out really sucks. Like I said before - I WISH that people would just support me in the way I need it without me asking for it, but it doesn't happen that way - especially when life is perpetually "fine".



So that brings me back to being real, authentic and honest and bold and trusting. I know there are certain topics and specifics that aren't generally discussed, but sometimes I feel like they need to be out there in order to have a real discussion. If I tell you that we had a really rough month last month and Dave's paycheck was low that allows you to assume that maybe he just barely made the bills, or he fell a couple of hundred dollars short and we have to dip into savings to cover it. However, if I tell you that his paycheck was $743 for the entire month and that covers our tithe and only part of our groceries, well, that allows you to assume that financially things are really, really sucky right now:) And stressful - but I will get further into that later. In addition, a year from now (hopefully) when he is finally making enough money to pay our bills, having known the specifics our our situation allows you a greater opportunity to rejoice and praise with us and to further understand how amazing it feels on our end - see how that works?!!



As I said before, one of the reasons for going real and private is so that I can look back years from now and remember how life was at this time. I can draw from this experience and help others who may need it in a similar way. In addition though, I want my girls and my grandkids to have this - to know this, to understand this about us someday. I LOVE to hear stories of my grandparents when they were first married and how they got through the difficulties of their early marriage. I never hear those stories from my parents, but I would love to. I think hearing it from my grandparents gives me a perspective of faithfulness and hope and an understanding of them and how they became who they are and why they have the faith in God that they have. Theirs is a journey of faithfulness - from God and from them. I want my kids to have that.



And its not only that. I need this too. I need to write it out for myself to get it out of my head, but I also - probably more importantly - need to be able to go back and read about God's faithfulness and provision and the amazing ways that He worked in our lives. And I can't see that if I'm not real about it. I have a very poor memory... we have some very incredible examples of God working in our 10 year marriage, but even now I'm kind of like, "Wait, how did that go again?" So hopefully a current journal will aleviate that issue 10 years from now:)



I'm excited about this - I need this.

Authenticity

As of next week my blog is going private. There are several reasons for this... mostly because I'm having a huge urge to be truly authentic and real and honest in my journaling right now. I'm not interested in putting on a facade, but am looking for authentic, real community. We are struggling right now and I have very few avenues of really getting my feelings out -writing is the best thing for me. I've tried the private, no other reader journal/blog, but I found that I missed having interaction and other thoughts/suggestions and communication with others.

Cornbread was telling me this morning, that in a conversation with a friend, it was suggested that instead of trying so hard to try to plan for the future and figure out what we're going to do "if", that we should be focusing on the present and living life in wonder and awe of how God is miraculously working in our lives. We are learning dependence in a way that I never thought we'd have to learn... and God is working. It is hard, though, to recognize it or to realize that God can work in our lives while he is working in others' lives. Cornbread was relating to our friend that while we are struggling and scared, there are others around us who have it even worse than us and it feels selfish to ask God to prioritize us above them... but the real deal is that God doesn't prioritize... He works good in the lives of all those who love him - not just those who need him worse than others.

It has been a really rough few months for us and it doesn't promise to get any better, but God has been faithful in the last 10 years - and very evident - and there is no reason to think that He has abandoned us or won't continue to be faithful. I feel like I need to get stuff out of my head and into words so I can recognize Him or have someone who reads this recognize him for me:)

In addition, I've been thinking about the purpose of my blog. It is a nice way to share pictures and share stories of the girls with our families, but really that isn't all of me. I have always wanted to have a journal of life right now - life as a stay at home mom with three small children, life as the spouse of someone trying to build a new business... because in a lot of ways, I feel unsupported - I'm not complaining or blaming anyone. The problem is most of the reason I feel unsupported is because I don't share with people that I need support or how I can use help. I can do it on my own, you know? So one of my biggest desires is that I would be able to draw on my previous experiences in order to support other women that are in my position when I have long moved out of it. I wish that people in my life would just offer up the support I need without me having to ask for it - doesn't everyone? But it doesn't work that way. However, if I can read about my current life 10 years from now and recognize how I might have needed help and then be able to do that for someone else without them having to ask, then I will be happy.

So those are a couple of reasons why I'm going private. I have no intentions of complaining about people or spouting opinions on people or their actions or decisions. I'm not going private so that certain people don't have access to my thoughts, I'm going private because I'm going real. I once had a blog where I journaled my actual thoughts about a certain situation and people in my life and it was found and created some serious pain in my life and in our family. I made a very poor error in judgement in putting those thoughts on the WWW, which is part of the reason why this blog has been so vague and surfacey. This is not about that, though. This is about our real life and I don't think anyone and everyone needs to be a part of it.

I invite you to join me if:
* you are will to read about my real life without judging me
* you are willing to participate by leaving comments
* you are willing to be authentic in your relationship with me
* you are willing to hold me accountable when necessary
* you are willing to be a truth teller
* you are willing to share how God is working in your life

I think I need your email address in order to give you access to the blog. Please email me at jddykstra@comcast.net if you are interested.

I will be blunt: I'm going to be vigilant about maintaining the list of people who can access this - if you have been reading, but haven't been participating in a while you will be deleted. I'm not trying to allow a bunch of people into my life, but rather am trying to build a community of friends who share lives.

The Day She Turned 3

On each of the girls' third birthdays, I have recorded the day in photos. Nora's happened before I started this blog... I'm going to have to post that one someday. But you can see Ryann's here.

So our Bugly turned 3 yesterday... She had an exciting day of eating and playing:)

Waiting for breakfast with Nora:

Eating a snack at Doug & Jenny's (We went there to hang out during the Bear's game):

Showing off Toto - her new puppy in a purse:
Playing ghost, I guess:)

Coloring - on paper:

Watching Nemo - waiting for Nemo to touch the butt:

Hiding while Nemo gets yelled at:

Rearranging picture frames - because this is what she does when she's there:

Hitting the need-a-nap wall. Here she hurt her toe:

And here, well, we just don't know what was wrong here:

Sleeping on Mom's lap:)

Mmmmm.

Still sleepy from her nap and in David's arms - one of her favorite places ever:

Leaving Doug's - not happy because she's cold:

Playing with her new snugglekins - monkey named JoJo:

Birthday French Toast in front of the tv - quite a treat - watching the all new Hannah Montanna:

Changed into jammies and posing for a nice picture (obliging mom's request):

Playing with her new Lite Bright:

Getting ready for bed: Trying to comfort Jo Jo:

Putting JoJo to bed while Daddy reads to Nora and Ryann helps:

Reading in bed:

Its hard to believe she's 3 already:)

Things I really learned in Mexico

Here are some lessons/thoughts that I brought home with me from Mexico:

* Everyone sweats. No one cares. The Mexicans do construction work in the 100 degree heat and humidity while wearing sweatshirts. This is kind of a big deal for me because I sweat. A lot.

* 100 degree heat and humidity feel much different in an oceanside city than they do in the Midwest.

* Running in that climate = sweating in places that you didn't think actually sweat. I would look down while I was running and my shoulder and biceps were sweating... I never sweat there. Totally weird.

* I can eat chips and guacamole every day and that is one of the things I miss the most about our trip.

* Real Mexican food is much different than American Mexican food (mexican food in the states). We have a very favorite Mexican restaurant by us - El Cortez. We LOVE it... mmmm, I'm getting hungry. But Mexican food in Mexico is much different - at least in the coastal town that we were in. They used very little cheese, unless we actually ordered nachos. We hardly saw cheese. We didn't eat any ground beef. Tacos were not on the menu at any of the restaurants that we ate at (with the exception of fish tacos at a few of them). They use fresh foods and lots and lots of vegetables and very little cheese. The food wasn't greasy at all and it didn't cause internal intestinal distress which sometimes comes along with American Mexican food (tmi?).

All of this may not be the case for all of Mexico, but it was for this area. It was MY IDEAL FOOD - I loved every bit of it and wish I could eat like that every day... it was much healthier than at home. In fact, I ate 3 good sized meals everyday, desserts on a couple of nights, chips and guacamole at least once a day, and had at least one beer every day, sometimes two - probably more than twice as much as I eat normally at home - and I didn't gain a single pound. Not one.

* Mexican salsa is much different than salsa you buy here in a jar - or even salsa that I've made from scratch. Basically, they chop up tomatos and onions, add a little bit of jalepeno pepper and some fresh chopped cilantro. Thats it. It was sooooo good. It wasn't soupy like what we eat here, but fresh and chunky. I LOVED it and plan to make it that way all next summer. Mmmm.

* Time is never an issue for Mexicans... We ordered room service for breakfast every morning. One day it would come in 15 minutes, one day it would be 45 - and we always ordered the same thing: granola, a fruit plate and either waffles or french toast and orange juice. One night we were coming home from Cabo and had gotten the 9pm shuttle back to the resort. Our shuttle was full - packed. We were sitting very close to each other and it was hot. Our driver decided that it was no big deal to sit outside and chat with his friend for 20 minutes while we sat and waited for him. What? Can you imagine if that happened here? There is simply no sense of urgency there.

* Unfinished projects do not seem to bother anyone - I would totally fit in there;) For example, our resort had started a new development project behind the building we were staying in. They got the support beams up for 5 or 6 new 4 story buildings. And then they stopped. Not sure why. But there the "buildings" stood with no one working on them. We saw other examples of this throughout the week... things that had gotten started, but never completed. This is totally me.

* When ordering water in a restaurant it was IMPERATIVE that you order house water instead of bottled water. If you didn't specify that you wanted house water"you would get bottled water and be charged for every bottle they used to refill your glass. One couple told us that they went to dinner and had $60 (US) in charges just in water. House water was water from a pitcher and it was fine - we drank it all week and had no problems whatsoever.

* The crime rate in Los Cabos/Cabo San Lucas is extremely low because everyone has a job. I learned this from my surfing instructor, Manny. After hearing that, Cornbread and I realized that while we were exploring the town on Monday we had felt very safe - never felt uncomfortable, never felt the need to look over our shoulders, just very safe. Probably safer than we feel sometimes in Chicago (depending on where we're walking).

* Surfing is the most exhausting, but exhilirating thing I have ever done. Most of the time is spent paddling against the waves and being beaten up by the waves. You fall off, get back on and paddle back out to wait for another one, which you may or may not get on and which will last all of 30 seconds. But holy crap, the challenge of it all is amazing... the learning process... the fun and elation of actually standing up and riding a wave all the way to the beach... the challenge of finding and trying the next wave... It is nothing I can describe and nothing I've experienced before. It was amazing.

Things I learned in Mexico

Roll your eyes if you must, but I want to move to Cabo San Lucas... its not just about being on vacation its about life there. And if something happens here where we lose our house, Cornbread loses his job, etc. etc. we are going to look into it - I'm not joking. There was a point where I was sitting at the table, reading the newspaper and drinking my coffee where I thought, "Why are we living here? We could live anywhere in the world - why aren't we living somewhere beautiful with a simpler life?"

We are trying to live a more simple life here in Homer Glen - a southwest suburb of Chicago. However, I feel like it is a constant battle. It is counter cultural to want less stuff instead of more and I get weary of the fight. I'm not saying that people are fighting me, but that I am fighting with myself and my desire to live a certain way but being drawn to consume and accumulate anyway. Sometimes I feel it would be easier if I just gave in and lived in a reactionary way instead of trying to be intentional... but then I remember how I felt at the end of this summer and know that makes me unhappy.

In Los Cabos, they aren't fighting to consume. It is a third world country - yes - so they are fighting more to eat and feed their children. I understand that. I also understand that the grass is greener on the other side, but I feel like a burden would be lifted from me if I lived in a place like that (this also explains my desire to move to a small town).

And then lets talk about beauty. Illinois is nice. Our neighborhood is nice. But if you look outside right now it is drab and kind of dreary. The last few days have been wonderful - 70's in November - but it isn't PRETTY outside right now because its fall. Los Cabos has desert (which is not pretty) and mountains (which are) and the ocean... and it is sunny and beautiful. Why wouldn't I want to surround myself in that everyday and be in a place where I can surf every single morning?

Again - I fully recognize that the grass is greener on the other side and everything there looks perfect from here. I struggle, though, with the busyness of life here and the quiet, calm, laid back life of Mexico looks good to me.


Wow - I wasn't planning to blog about that today;) Here is my list of things I learned in Mexico - I will discuss in more detail later:

* Chips and guacamole
* Mexican food vs. American food
* Mexican salsa
* Time
* surfing
* unfinished projects
* house water
* crime rate

Interesting Election Results

It has been 2 years of campaigning. Two years of discussing and debating. Two years of some of the nastiest things I have ever heard - not from the candidates, but from the people voting for the candidates. Quite frankly, I've been shocked and disappointed at some of the stuff that people have said and the inconsistency in character that the resulted from the comments.

Cornbread and I have had many discussions about the candidates and who we should vote for and why we should vote for that person. To be honest, neither of us made up our mind until this past Sunday...

What I found interesting, though, is that even though we kept our cards very close to our chest with our girls (not on purpose, just happened to be that our discussions happened while they weren't around) and never indicated to them who we would be voting for, they both chose McCain when they voted at school this week.

I asked each of them "Why?" We haven't really discussed anything in front of them. The could not have based their votes on our votes because they didn't know our votes. Yet, they chose McCain and I was curious how they came to that decision. Neither could give me an answer - neither had a reason. They just did.

So are they natural republicans? Are they natural conservatives? Or does McCain look like a nice grandpa to them?

saturday

Saturday was our last day/travel day. We were quite lucky that our flight was at 1:15 and we didn't have to leave at the crack of dawn like some of our friends. We were able to hang out until 10 and enjoy a little bit of the morning.

We got up, worked out, showered, packed our final things and left our luggage at the door for the luggage pull (minus our carry on this time). We had decided earlier in the week that we would wait for the breakfast buffet until Saturday (it was quite expensive and we figured it would be good to overfill that morning because we probably wouldn't eat again until dinner).

I LOVE BREAKFAST BUFFETS!

After eating our fill, I then commenced on the juice course... they had all of these weird juices and I felt it was my duty to try them before we left. We had a bunch of glasses on the table and I didn't think Cornbread was going to partake, but he was a champ and tried them all.

Pear: tasted like apple juice
Melon: Ick - tasted like honeydew melon, which is good as a food, not as a juice
Papaya: Ick - I don't like papaya and having it in juice form doesn't make it any better
Celery: this one was bright green and a little scary for me. It wasn't too bad - tasted exactly like celery, but sweeter.
Beet: Ick - smelled like dirt and tasted like dirt and was chunky. Cornbread didn't think it was as bad as I was saying, but trust me it was nasty.

After the juice course was over, we went to the lobby to wait for our shuttle and I stared at the ocean for another 15 minutes before being dragged away. We weren't ready to go home yet - we both decided that one more day would have been nice... and in the future we may extend our stay by one day. We really weren't missing or even thinking about the girls - we had talked to them once during the week and they were fine. It was nice to be away and to escape the stresses of home, but as I mentioned before the constant socialness of this vacation was tiring for me - if we had one more day without everyone else, it would have been perfect.

The rest of our day was spent traveling. Our plane landed at 6pm and we were picked up at 7 and home by 7:45. We were greeted by our girls running to us... okay, well Nora and Ryann did. Georgia couldn't be bothered by our arrival at first;) While I would have liked another day, it was good to finally be home and to see them and hug them.

And I've been amazed at the increase in patience I have had since being away from them;)

Friday

Friday was our last real day in Mexico, so we had decided to do nothing for the day and just enjoy the weather and the resort. I got up that morning and worked out - first time ever on an eliptical and still not sure what I thought about it - and came back to the room for our daily room service breakfast. I was loving the daily breakfast on the balcony... I had the same thing every day - granola and a plate of fruit - and we enjoyed the breakfast, coffee, the birds building a nest in the palm tree in front of us, the woodpecker giving himself a headache, and the random people that we would see below (not many before 10am). We discussed Cornbread's business, the stress of everything going on and the ideas we were getting from the people we were meeting. It was peaceful, quiet and time by ourselves.
We eventually made our way down to the pool and grabbed some chairs by the roommate and his wife and a few others. We got a game of pool volleyball together - the weather had changed at some point on Thursday: the humidity had broken and it had cooled down to around 80 degrees... now the pool felt kind of cold and I had no interest in staying in for too long. In fact, it felt much better to sit on the chair in the sun. My biggest problem of the day was that I was at the best part of my book and I was struggling with wanting to read it and not wanting to put it down and wanting to save it for the plane ride;)

We had lunch and decided to spend the rest of the afternoon on the beach. We grabbed some chairs and read for the rest of the afternoon... I finally got up around 4:30 to go to the room to shower, change and pack.

Our farewell dinner was on the same terrace as the welcome dinner. The weather was nicer - we didn't sweat just by breathing this time - and the view was still amazing. We sat with Kevin and J. Twidd, the couple from Albuquerque that had gone surfing with us, and the head of Compliance and his wife (another general partner who was hosting the trip). Dinner was surf and turf - a big fillet felt kind of heavy and wrong to me in Mexico sitting by the ocean, so I focused on the shrimp portion:)

Dinner was nice, but I was emotionally and socially exhausted by this point and decided to go back to the room by myself for a little bit. It was only 8:30, but I needed to be by myself for a while. It occurred to me that this trip was awesome and amazing and a wonderful gift, but it was exhausting for me... we endured nearly constant small talk for a week. There were 75 other FA's and their spouses at the resort and it was almost impossible to go anywhere without running into someone that looked familiar. It always involved the same 5 minute conversation: "How many years have you been with Jones? Where are you from? How many trips have you been on? Where have you gone? Which was your favorite?" Occasionally, the conversation would go further, however, relationship building was not really on anyone's mind. Which is totally understandable, but just difficult for me to endure for 5-6 days straight and I needed to get away from it.

I went back to our room and reluctantly finished my book;)

Thursday

Neither of us slept very well while we were in Mexico. I think my problem was the pillows - they were those super soft down pillows where your head sinks all the way to the mattress so it feels like you're not really sleeping on a pillow. I'm not sure what else it could have been - actually its probably more likely that we consistently get enough sleep at home (7-8 hours every night) and were going to bed at a decent time in Mexico and didn't need more sleep than what we were getting. Whatever the case, we woke up at 5:30/6:00 every morning on vacation - without an alarm. Both of us. Every day.

I get bored pretty quickly, so the options at that time in the morning were: workout or go to the beach to watch the sunrise. We had decided that we wouldn't workout on the days that we had excursions, so on Thursday morning we went down to the beach to watch the sunrise.

When we got down there around 7, the sky was light with a pinkish stripe along the horizon. We hung out and took pictures for about 10-15 minutes before we saw this:

It looked like someone lit a lantern just beyond the edge of the world. And over the course of the next 5 minutes the sun came up like a perfect, round circle in the sky. It was pretty amazing.

The resort is very quiet at that time of the morning, too - only a few employees are out and we only saw 1 or 2 other guests on the beach. It was very peaceful.

We went back to our room, had breakfast and then took our books down to the pool to read for a while before our snorkeling excursion.

We met in the lobby at 11am for our snorkeling excursion. There was quite a bit of confusion about the cost of the trip and the need to pay for transportation - amongst MANY of us. Basically, it appeared that people were paying different prices for the same trip... we (and a few others) paid $119/person, someone else paid $49/person and others paid $59/person. In addition, those of us who paid the higher rate had been assured that transportation was included - and now they were telling us it wasn't. We hadn't brought any money with us so Cornbread had to run back to the room to get some. We were not the only couple who had this issue. Ultimately, we all paid the $49/person rate, but we didn't find that out until we got back to the states... it was kind of upsetting and a whole lot of mass confusion.

At any rate, we all went on the snorkeling excursion. Basically it was a booze cruise (and we didn't realize that was what it was going to be until it was too late). There were about 75-80 of us on a catamaran and the crew had an open bar with several kinds of liquor and were doing their best to create a party atmosphere... I don't think they realized, however, that they were trying to create a party with a bunch of conservative financial advisors. They worked pretty hard at it, but I don't think they were all that successful;)

We left a marina in Cabo and went past the arch. Cabo San Lucas is located at the southern tip of the Baja Peninsula. The most southern part of the peninsula is a group of natural rock formations - one of which is a natural arch. This is a picture of the whole group (not my picture):

And a picture of the arch (again, not my picture). While we were going past it, there was a bunch of seals on the rock to the left of the arch. We heard them before we saw them and then watched a couple of them fall/jump into the water and play around by our boat.

We were pretty happy that we had a chance to see the arch up close (which we later decided was worth the price of the excursion). After this, we sailed north - past our resort - to a cove between Los Cabos and San Jose Los Cabos (it was probably an hour+ sail). We anchored in the small cove - next to two other boats with groups the same size as ours - and we jumped off to snorkel. I stayed in the water for, oh, about 4 minutes before I swam to the shore and sat on the beach for the rest of the time. The snorkeling was horrible - it was a small cove, there were too many people so you couldn't swim without touching someone else, there weren't that many fish, and the current was strong so I felt like I was being pushed into the rocks. Cornbread and I have been spoiled by previous snorkeling (Jamaica & Cozumel) and this was terrible. So we sat on the beach until the crew called everyone back.

We had lunch while we sailed back to cabo and then the crew came around to give everyone a shot of tequila. We both refused and they couldn't understand why... it was a very interesting trip - it was very apparent that they were used to a different crowd;)

When we got back to the resort we went to the pool and hung out with Kevin and J. Twidd for the rest of the afternoon. It was really nice to be with friends and not have to do the whole small-talk thing anymore... just hanging out, chatting and laughing like we had been friends for much longer than 4 1/2 days.

We had been invited to another dine around dinner, but this time with a wholesaler. We were with a group of 5 other EJ couples and this group was MUCH better! We had dinner at Peacock's and had a wonderful time! We really enjoyed the company and the food was fabulous (although still wasn't as good as my Ranchero Shrimp at The Shrimp Factory). The nice thing about this dinner was that it was kind of a sales thing for the wholesaler, so everything was flowing very freely - we had bottle after bottle of really good red wine (a lot of bottles for 13 people), a bunch of appetizers, soup, dinner and dessert. Basically whatever we wanted... it was certainly very nice to be wined and dined like that... Cornbread gets this a lot, but his wife doesn't:)

It was nice to connect so well with some of the other people. We talked extensively with a regional leader/general partner from Arizona (and his wife). We also talked with an FA from Montanna who brought her sister... People are so interesting! Unlike the previous night, we were disappointed when dinner came to an end. It was definitely the best evening of the trip.