I hate Comcast

The title has absolutely nothing to do with this post, but had to get it out. I hate them. I don't use that word often as I believe it is a terribly ugly and usually unnecessary word, however, Comcast deserves that word directed at them. Not only are their services beyond expensive and we don't have a choice because there is no competition, but their service sucks. There. I've said it. Its out and now I feel better (okay, I don't really feel better, but I kind of feel better... I'd really feel better if I had another option.)

On to nicer, mushier things. Another mushy post (for explanation please see this).

"Our different homes perhaps a continent apart. All my dear friends.

Known only for a brief time and sometimes so long ago,

but alive forever in my mind and heart."

- Helen Thomson. B.1943

Jug and Apaya

You thought I was special at a time that I really, really needed to be special. You guys treated me like a princess and thought I could do no wrong. You liked me. You were 28 & 25. I was 19, but you enjoyed hanging out with me. You called me. You helped me become the person I am. You helped me, unknowingly, develop a confidence that I'd never had before. I have no idea where you are or what happened to you... For 18-24 months you were in my life. You changed me and I thank you.

What do you call yours?

We were in Michigan last weekend. Dave, Nora and Ryann went camping with Dave's dad. Georgia and I hung with my mom at my grandparents cottage. Very nice. I read. Did you see that? I R.E.A.D. A book - well, not the entire book, but words in a book. And I read the words in the book on the deck by the lake and I had nothing else to do. I didn't have laundry to fold. I didn't have dishes to wash (okay, so I did... but I did them when I wanted to), I didn't have anything else to do. It was very enjoyable - and so is my book.


The dog stayed with my grandparents for the weekend (they weren't at the cottage). Yes, I had one child and no dog for a full 24 hours. No barking. No woofing. No scratching. No dirty looks. It was blissful. H-anyway... when we were pulling out of my grandparents driveway to go home I told the girls to wave (because Gram and Gramp always stand on the doorstep and wave as we drive away) and said, "I love my Gram and Gramp." To which Nora responded, "Why do you call them Gram and Gramp?" We had a pretty lengthy "conversation" in which I tried to explain that that is just what I call my Grandma and Grandpa. She didn't quite understand. I told her that they are my Grandma and Grandpa and I just call them Gram and Gramp. She didn't get it. So I asked her, "Why do you call Grandpa and Grandma Dykstra Papa and Nana?" Response: "Because they're my Papa and Nana!" DUH! How stupid am I?

Our girls call Dave's parents Papa and Nana and they call my parents Grandpa and Grandma. My nephews call my parents Pa and Mimi (they used to - don't know if they still do). They call Gram and Gramp, Mimo and BoatPa. They call their other grandma, Grammy. They call my other grandma, Grandma Great. Did you follow that?? (you don't need to). I had a friend in high school who called one of his grandpa's Bumpa because there was a sign on the way to his house that said "Bump". Even at 18 he called him Bumpa. My best friend in high school called her grandparents Oma and Opa (the dutch words for grandma and grandpa). What do you call your grandparents - and why?

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Pocket inventory - 4:45pm:
4 ponytail holders - 1 red, 1 yellow, 1 blue, 1 purple
3 quarters, 1 penny
1 backgammon piece (white)
1 red button from Ryann's pants
11 barretts - 2 large (1 black & 1 pink polka dots), 1 medium (orange butterfly), 6 small (2aqua, 1 red, 1 orange, 1 pink sparkles, 1 purple), & 2 bug barettes (1 purple & 1 green)
1 bookshelf peg

Sometimes I'm mushy

When Georgia was in the hospital for pneumonia (remember - she was 6 weeks old? Just thought I'd remind you of the terrifying situation;) a friend of mine gave me this book. The book has maybe 100 pages (they aren't numbered) and each page or every other page has a quote about friendship on it. To be honest, when she first gave it to me, I kind of looked at it and thought, "This is nice" and figured I'd look at it in more depth later. I kind of tucked it away and didn't do anything with it until I found it two weeks ago while doing my secret project. Since finding it, I have read and re-read every page many times. I've thought and thought and thought while holding the book. Finally I decided that I wanted to think of a friend that I'm reminded of by each quote and write something about him or her.

I'm hoping that in my lifetime God will bless me with enough friends to fill every page. I'm hoping that at some point I will be able to share my thoughts with each of these friends personally, if I haven't already. I find it is difficult to stumble upon a conversation or a situation that lends itself to sharing my true feelings about someone to that person (sorry - I think that was a pretty bad sentence, but I don't know how else to say that). Having this book has helped me be intentional about thinking about how I feel about my friends and putting my feelings into words. My words may not be incredibly eloquent or articulate (see sentence above LOL!), but actually putting my feelings about my friends onto paper has been incredibly cathartic for me. Taking the time to really - I mean really - think about what my friends mean to me has been intensely gratifying.

I'd like to offer you a glimpse into my friendships every so often (okay, basically when I feel a need to blog, but my life is too boring to have something to blog about). I'm not going to do these in order of how much I love these people or in any particular order whatsoever, so please don't be offended if I don't start with you:)

"How life catches up with us and teaches us to love and forgive each other."

-Judy Collins. B.1939

Cara

Why did it take so long for us to get along and like each other? It took 22 years for us to get along and 3 more years for us to really like each other. I love you. Out of everyone, you are truly my best friend. You know me, you understand me, you allow me to be myself completely. You laugh with me and at me and you make me laugh like no one else in my life. No one.

I love you and I know I don't tell you often enough. I am honored to be able to call you my best friend and to have a lifetime of memories of you and with you.

I wish we lived closer. I'm not just saying that - I really, really long to have you closer, geographically. I want to have coffee once a week, to work on our houses together, to babysit each others kids, to go out for drinks, to do everything together. I want to share our lives - for real, not just over the phone. I miss you and I love you.

Side note: Cara - do NOT call me and get all mushy on the phone with me;) You know how I don't like to talk about these things. I'm dutch and I have no feelings whatsoever so don't try to talk to me about them - I'm fine.

Whats in YOUR wallet?

I think we can safely assume that there is absolutely nada in my wallet. However, there is always an interesting array of items in my pocket every night. I have a baby who is about ready to crawl and who puts absolutely everything in her mouth. Not really a problem - EXCEPT... I also have a 2 year old who picks things up and deposits them wherever she happens to get an idea to do something else. Consequently I have many things all over the place... remember I told you about the plunger next to the front door?

H-anyways, I am constantly walking through the house and picking things up off of the floor as I go. I always put the small things in my pocket to take care of later. At the end of the night I have a pocketful of "stuff".

Last night's pocket contents:
*5 barrettes - 1 tiny (yellow), 1 medium (white), 3 large (black, pink, purple).
*1 pony tail holder - red
*5 screws from the secret project
*1 bracelet
*$.50 - 1 quarter, 1 nickle, 1 dime, 10 pennies (and yes they all came off of the floor).

Tonight when you get ready for bed and empty your pockets, take inventory and tell me - Whats in YOUR pockets?

Smellers

Melissa:) brought another smeller to my attention:


Kevin Federline - I'm sorry, but no matter how many baths this guy takes, he always looks like he smells.

I also thought of another one - a female... I think the female smeller is a rare breed, but here is one: (I'm afraid to post her name because what if she googles her name and my blog comes up and she reads that I called her a smeller and she comes to kick my bum? I'm a little scared of her - she looks like she could be terrifying in real life. So I will just say that her name is "A color" - the color that my girls' clothes are when they are born. Enough said, I think)

All Are Welcome

Yesterday I brought Nora to VBS at the Lutheran church where her friend, Luke, goes to preschool. Luke's mom and I drove into the parking lot at the same time, got out of the car and she says to me, "I'm sooooo sorry. I just noticed this morning that they needed to be pre-registered by June 20. I called and they said they have 2 preschool openings." We were there early to register anyway, so we went in hoping that we'd get the 2 openings.

Walked in. Immediately in front of us is the name tag/greeter desk. Immediately behind the desk are the doors to the gym - where the kids were gathering and would be singing. Above the door to the gym was a huge sign that said, "All Are Welcome."

We walked in and were immediately greeted by the greeter lady. She asked if we were registered and we told her that we weren't, but would like to try to register the two kids anyway. She went into a tizzy about how they are supposed to be pre-registered. Meanwhile, Ryann is pushing Georgia all over the place in her stroller, Luke's mom had gone to talk to someone else about registering the kids and this lady is yapping about there not being enough space for Nora and Luke and she would go talk to the head of VBS.

I found my friend who had been told that they would get the kids in and it wouldn't be a problem. As she was registering Luke, the Greeter came back to me and went on and on about how the leader of VBS was going to find out if it was okay if the non-registered kids could come in. I told her that my friend had worked it out with this other lady. "Oh no, the VBS leader needs to ask if there is enough space in the preschool for your kids. I don't think that is okay." I looked at her and said, "I'm just the mom - you need to go work that out with the other lady. As far as I'm concerned they're getting registered."

I don't think she knew how to respond.

Nora and Luke got in and all was good. Until we picked them up... It was mass chaos as all VBS's are when it is pick up time. As Luke's mom and I were leaving with all of our kids (she has 3 and I have 3) a VBS lady came up to us and looked rather friendly. I thought she was going to ask the kids how Bible school was and if they had a good time - she just had that look on her face. This is what she said:

"Um, He needs to leave that hat here - he can't take it home with him." That was it. Rude - totally rude.

Evidently, All are only welcome when they are pre-registered and not trying to run off with the props.

I was thoroughly disgusted by this whole situation (and if Nora hadn't asked to go back, I don't think I would have brought her back this morning). Come on - All are welcome. Really? You're really going to put that sign up and advertise that to the world and then act like that? I understand the idea behind pre-registering kids. I also understand the confusion of the first day of VBS, however, where is the christian spirit - the acceptance, the "it doesn't matter, we love you and we welcome you even if it means we have to cut a cupcake in half so you can have a snack with us"?

When are we going to REALLY walk the walk? When are we going to REALLy act like Christ? Why can't we just love each other? Why does life get in the way and we find the details and the organizational stuff more important than loving each other?

8 months

Georgia is 8 months.
Here is a snapshot of how our Bug is fairing these days:
*Sleeping: up around 7/7:30, out of bed around 8am. Nap: 10-12/12:15, Nap: 2:30-5/5:15, Bed: 8pm

*Eating: 8oz bottle in the morning (she usually drinks 6oz), some cereal, Lunch: 6 oz. bottle, 1/2 jar meat/veggies, 1/2 jar fruit & some kind of finger food (frozen veggies, bread, cheese), Dinner: same as lunch

* Not crawling yet and not even rocking on all fours. Still does not like to be on her tummy and yells if she falls over and stays on her tummy for too long. She gets around by moving on her bum. While she's sitting up she leans over like she's going to get on all fours but never does, then she moves herself over or turns around. Like this -------------->

* She is a talky talk - thats what we call the babblers in our house. She is ALWAYS chattering and screeching. She says a lot of gaga's and dada's and I'm pretty sure she imitated me saying Da-dee a couple of weeks ago. Of course, she has no idea what she is saying, but I'm certain she said it. At this point, when I hear how much she talks, I now realize how much Ryann did NOT talk at this age. Ryann did not do any of this...

* She loves to play with her toys on the floor and no longer likes to be in the exersaucer. If I put her in there she is complaining within 5 minutes because she'd rather be on the floor where she can move around.

* She has her 2 bottom teeth and her smile is adorable:)

* She likes to eat any table food I give her. Loves green beans. Loves avocado. Loves corn. Loves pancakes - whatever. She very much enjoys trying anything.

* She likes to pet Brady and watches him walk through the room.

* She LOVES to watch Nora and Ryann play. Here she is watching Ryann run from the bathroom to the bedroom ->


She is a true delight - always a smile on her face, rarely fussy, rarely crying. I really thank God every night for this wonderful surprise - I've gotten so much more than just another child when He surprised us with her - a new appreciation for babies (Ryann kind of soured my opinion of having babies;), and a new friend. I would say that this was a win win win thing that happened in our lives. Never in a million years would I have guessed, while crying about the positive pregnancy test, about all of the many ways my life would be changed with this pregnancy and child.

Apparently I can't add more photos to this post, so I'll do an additional post of just pictures - because you HAVE to see how cute she is;)

Just photos

6 week offensive - redeux

So I was dumb and started that 6 week offensive plan a week before the 4th of July. What? Hello? Why didn't any of you kind people tell me how dumb that was? My biggest problem with losing weight right now is that there is always some kind of event that messes my momentum up - Memorial Day BBQ, 4th of July, vacation, the summer regional, etc. etc. So why in the world did I start one week before the 4th? Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Lesson learned. I did good for that first week, then lost it last week... I'm starting over:)

So I started again today. My plan is the same, but I have two additions: The end date (the end of the 6 weeks) and my current weight.

Lets review the goals:

Workout: Stairs or Running + PT exercises, 6 days/week
Water: At least 64 oz per day
WW Points: 20-22 pts per day
Bed: 10:30pm
No eating after 9pm

Current Weight: 144.8
Goal Weight: 120.0 (dream weight: 110)
Weight to Lose: 24.8 (dream: 34.8)

End of 6 weeks: August 19, 2006
Goal to lose 24.8 pounds: October 10, 2006

We'll see how it goes - I'll keep you posted:)

Smellers

Do you know what a smeller is? Very simple - A smeller is someone who just LOOKS like he/she smells. I have a list of them:

Jack Nicholson (some people get smellier as they get older)
Johnny Depp
Al Pacino
Jack Black
Axl Rose
Okay, basically anyone who was in an 80s hairband

That is a short list. If given enough time, I might be able to come up with some more... This is often a topic of conversation in our house. One of us sees someone on tv or a movie and we just look at the other and say "Smeller" and nothing more needs to be said. However, last night Dave told me that one of the girls on So You Think You Can Dance is a smeller and I absolutely disagree. I have final say in the smeller categorization in our house and my answer to whether or not Heidi is a smeller is NO.

My question for you this weekend is: Who do you think is a smeller? Give me some names, people.

I'm It

I'm so glad I got tagged - I was worried I would be the last one in the schoolyard waiting to be picked. I'm a child...

1. My home is... a money pit.
2. I am listening to... WOW Worship - the blue one.
3. Maybe I should... get off the computer and get back to working on my secret project.
4. I love it when... I get a real, handwritten letter in the mail, Dave tells me I'm beautiful, my girls say "I love you mama", I hear Georgia chattering in her crib in the morning.
5. My best friend... lives in Tennessee and won't move back home no matter how much I beg her. My other best friend lives in Detroit and won't move here no matter how much I beg. Do I smell?
6. I don't understand... how or why people abuse or neglect their children.
7. I lost... my sanity when I became a mom.
8. People say... People say... "they" say a whole lot of things. Who are "they" and why are "they" so knowledgeable about so many things? "They" are like the Others. Thats it, I'm now always going to assume that "they" are The Others and are trying to trick us. My sister is a tailie.
9. The meaning of my blog name is... I have no idea. I didn't put that much thought into it.
10. Love is... unconditional.
11. Right now, somewhere, someone is... mourning.
12. I will always... be sincerely interested in who I am talking to.
13. Once upon a time... I thought my dog was awesome.
14. I never want to... see my girls' hearts ache.
15. My personal motto is... Make the grown up choice, not the easy choice. OR It might be hard now, but it makes things easier later.
16. When I wake up in the morning... I look forward to seeing little faces with sleepy eyes.
17. I get annoyed when... people are allowed to act however they want because "thats just who they are."
18. People always... People again? The others? The others always scare me.
19. I sing...alto.
20. Hugs are the best when... When? Always. Any hug is the best.
21. Today I... will work on my secret project.
23. Tomorrow I will... work on my secret project - its a long project.
24. I really want... my children to know and love Jesus, my husband and children to never doubt that I love them, to be a nurse.
25. If my girls/boys were born the opposite sex, I would have named them... Joshua, Jackson, Victor or Walter.

I'm going to tag two people... Kim because she NEVER does these things, so I'll probably have to tag a third person and Melissa:)

I've got a secret

I'm working on a little house project that I'm really excited about. I'm going to keep it a secret until I can do the photo reveal (and now I'm a bit ticked at myself for not taking before pictures). True to form I had no intentions of doing this so soon, but I just got an itch on Sunday and got started and now I'm so excited to see the finished result.

As with every major project I take on, everything else in the house suffers. Oh, the kids are fed, but they spent the entire day in their pajamas. The laundry is not being done, the dishes are barely being kept up with, the house is in disaray, but it only lasts a few days and then I feel like I have a whole new house so I'm excited to pick up where I left off before I left off.

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Ryann's fever has gone down (I'm assuming - I haven't taken her temperature, but she doesn't feel hot anymore). The fever lasted quite a long time (Friday - Sunday, 103 degrees) - she was so hot for so long, I felt miserable for her. I checked her throat this afternoon and her tonsils have also gone down and I didn't see white spots on them any more. So she seems to be getting better in that regard, however, she is so incredibly, unbearably crabby and always out of sorts that I can't hardly stand to be with her. She has a meltdown over the silliest, tiniest little thing - like she didn't get a blue bowl for lunch. I'm talking serious meltdown - screaming, crying uncontrollably, has to go up to her bed to calm herself down. Its been a pleasant time;) I don't know if this has to do with her being sick... the strep seems to be getting better, but she is terribly congested and stuffy and still is not eating a whole lot (she has barely eaten since Friday - cereal for breakfast, some fish crackers for a snack, yogurt for lunch - maybe - and usually nothing for dinner). Neither Dave, nor I have ever had strep so I don't know what it feels like or what to expect. I really hope the crabbiness is from the illness and not just her being 2 because I cannot handle a year of this.

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Yesterday at church the pastor talked about the first part of Psalm 23 and how we should be comforted by it in terms of God providing for us...

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
I lack nothing - I am in want of nothing - The Lord provides for my needs
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
What do sheep eat - grass. green grass. If a sheep is hungry where is the best place to go? A green pasture. However, these sheep (us) are lying down in the green pastures... therefore I am not hungry - The Lord provides for my needs.
He leads me beside still waters.
When a sheep is thirsty where is the best place to go? A raging stream or river? Or a still, calm body of water? The still water is easy and appealing to drink. However, these sheep (us) are walking beside the water. I'm not thirsty - The Lord provides for my needs.
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness for his names sake.

Wow did these verses and the pastor's discussion of them speak to me. We are so financially in a place of pain right now. I'm not going to get into the details as my intention is not to complain about that, but instead to recognize that God is providing for our needs. We are struggling and want so badly to get through this quickly, but know that it is a process and that God will bring us through. We want so badly to just be able to pay our bills and to take care of our children - these are the things I pray for. However, God provided a way for us to be able to do that until Dave is making enough money to be able to do those things. He HAS provided. He IS providing. And He WILL provide. We serve an incredible God. One who lavishes us with blessings beyond what we recognize or thank Him for; One who cares for us when we don't know He is doing so. I am humbled by this reminder.

So I'm going to use this as my memory verse for the week: Psalm 23. I have memorized this so many times throughout my christian education However, in the last year or so I realized that I no longer remember it correctly, so I am going to memorize it again this week. Sometimes I find it hard to even read some of these passages that I memorized so many times as a kid because I have such a cadence attached to them and I can't get beyond that... Psalm 23, Luke 2:2-10, I Cor 13 (right? the love passage), etc. Even if that is the case for you, I challenge you to memorize Psalm 23 with me this week.

6 week offensive - Week 2 Day 1

Monday, July 3, 2006

Beginning of week 2 of The Plan.

Workout: Week 2 Workout 1 of the Couch to 5k running schedule. Ran a total of 2.25 miles, total 25:00. Did not do physical therapy exercises because I was supposed to go to PT this afternoon. I ended up canceling my appointment - oops:)

Water: 64 oz

Points: Not sure, but pretty certain I went over. Its soooo hard to count points during holiday weekends.

Bed: Not sure yet, but may be up later because of holiday tomorrow and can get up later

Food after 9pm: Slipped on this one and had an ice cream bar (skinny cow - 2pts) around 9:20.

I figure that if I at least work out today and tomorrow I'm doing well. Holidays are hard.

6 week offensive - Week 1 recap

Overall the week went well. I did NOT work out on Saturday morning as I had intended to do. I went out with some friends to a mexican place downtown on Friday night. We sat on the patio until midnight and I didn't get home until 1:30, was too wound up to go right to sleep and finally went to sleep at 2am. All of that equals No work out for Jana on Saturday morning. Other than that, I kept up with the plan pretty well. I should increase my water drinking this week and follow my points a little closer. Am happy to have one week under my belt and looking forward to the next 5 - I really do like to exercise, its just a matter of getting started, so good job me!